Are you a Democrat, Republican, or a Southerner? AKA...The Taser Thread

**Niccivan** · 10-14-2007, 05:38 PM

Are you a Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner?

Here is a little test that will help you decide.

The answer can be found by posing the following question:

You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, an Islamic Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the
corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, praises Allah, raises the knife, and charges at you. You are carrying a Kimber 1911 cal. 45 ACP, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family. What do you do?

.................................................. .............

THINK CAREFULLY AND THEN SCROLL DOWN:

Democrat's Answer:

Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!
Does the man look poor or oppressed?
Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?
Could we run away?
What does my wife think?
What about the kids?
Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?
What does the law say about this situation?
Does the gun have an appropriate safety built into it?
Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?
Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?
Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?
If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me?
Should I call 9-1-1?
Why is this street so deserted?
We need to raise taxes, have paint and weed day and make this happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.
This is all so confusing! I need to debate this with some friends for few days and try to come to a consensus.

Republican's Answer:

BANG!

Southerner's Answer:

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
Click..... (Sounds of reloading) BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! Click
Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?"
Son: "Can I shoot the next one!"
Wife: "You ain't taking that to the Taxidermist!

**calgaryjimbo** · 10-14-2007, 06:05 PM

Well, thank God the Republican and the Southerner just shot him and didn't use a taser, 'cuz that would've been barbaric!

Sorry, couldn't resist.

I fall into option "D," Canadian: Repeatedly say "sorry" to the terrorist while he stabs me. But that assumes he mistakes me and my family as American, since terrorists don't attack Canadians.

**Ark_Angel_1** · 10-14-2007, 08:46 PM

Well, whomever posted the Southern part got it WRONG!!!

Before 'WE' kill..........we like to have a snort of moonshine first, makes the aim better!

**bhestertx** · 10-14-2007, 08:51 PM

Well, since it would only take me one shot I guess that would make me a Republican. But the southerner in me would say "Damn good time for some target practice!"

**ColdCase** · 10-15-2007, 09:55 AM

Originally Posted by calgaryjimbo

Well, thank God the Republican and the Southerner just shot him and didn't use a taser, 'cuz that would've been barbaric!

Sorry, couldn't resist.

.

This just in, but I guess it's just another 'indirect' consequence of tasering
and we shouldn't be looking into it any further. Afterall, as everyone knows, it's the ampage which kills and anyways it was a full 4 minutes after the tasering that the man in the following report croaks.
That makes it WAY indirect, so really....no need to concern ourselves.

It's all good!

Police confirm Taser used prior to man's death

Jonathan Woodward , CanWest News Service

Published: Monday, October 15, 2007
VANCOUVER -- A man is dead after he was Tasered by police following an incident at the Vancouver International Airport Sunday.
Police say the incident involved a man in his 40s who had disembarked from an international flight and was waiting for his luggage at about 1:30 a.m.
He began screaming in an Eastern European language and throwing chairs around, said RCMP spokesman Sgt. Pierre Lemaitre. RCMP officers stationed in the terminal building were called to deal with the situation after airport security failed to calm the man down, Lemaitre said.

"He grabbed a computer off a desk, he was pounding on the desk, he was sweating profusely," said Lemaitre in an interview.
Three policeman tried to speak to him, telling him to calm down, he said. When the man refused, officers used a Taser, which discharges 50,000 volts of electricity.
"The three officers tried to physically hold him down," said Lemaitre of what occurred after the Taser was used.
"There was no chokeholds, no punching. He was still yelling."
Lemaitre said officers managed to get handcuffs on the man, who then lapsed into unconsciousness.
Paramedics were called, but about four minutes after being Tasered, the man died.
The incident is now under investigation by the region's Integrated Homicide Investigation Team, which initially investigates in-custody and police-related deaths.
Investigators have yet to determine which flight the man was on, and what his destination was, and are contacting Interpol to determine if his passport shows the man's true identity, Lemaitre said.
About a dozen witnesses have been interviewed by police.
Police continue to look for passengers who may have been sitting near or next to the man on the flight.
Vancouver Sun

© CanWest News Service 2007

just sayin!

**SurfDogII** · 10-15-2007, 09:59 AM

Holy hell, I laughed....

Because I have MET that family!

**senator** · 10-15-2007, 01:58 PM

Which one,huh?

You tell me.

**calgaryjimbo** · 10-15-2007, 05:35 PM

Originally Posted by ColdCase

This just in, but I guess it's just another 'indirect' consequence of tasering
and we shouldn't be looking into it any further. Afterall, as everyone knows, it's the ampage which kills and anyways it was a full 4 minutes after the tasering that the man in the following report croaks.
That makes it WAY indirect, so really....no need to concern ourselves.

It's all good!

Police confirm Taser used prior to man's death

Jonathan Woodward , CanWest News Service

Published: Monday, October 15, 2007
VANCOUVER -- A man is dead after he was Tasered by police following an incident at the Vancouver International Airport Sunday.
Police say the incident involved a man in his 40s who had disembarked from an international flight and was waiting for his luggage at about 1:30 a.m.
He began screaming in an Eastern European language and throwing chairs around, said RCMP spokesman Sgt. Pierre Lemaitre. RCMP officers stationed in the terminal building were called to deal with the situation after airport security failed to calm the man down, Lemaitre said.

"He grabbed a computer off a desk, he was pounding on the desk, he was sweating profusely," said Lemaitre in an interview.
Three policeman tried to speak to him, telling him to calm down, he said. When the man refused, officers used a Taser, which discharges 50,000 volts of electricity.
"The three officers tried to physically hold him down," said Lemaitre of what occurred after the Taser was used.
"There was no chokeholds, no punching. He was still yelling."
Lemaitre said officers managed to get handcuffs on the man, who then lapsed into unconsciousness.
Paramedics were called, but about four minutes after being Tasered, the man died.
The incident is now under investigation by the region's Integrated Homicide Investigation Team, which initially investigates in-custody and police-related deaths.
Investigators have yet to determine which flight the man was on, and what his destination was, and are contacting Interpol to determine if his passport shows the man's true identity, Lemaitre said.
About a dozen witnesses have been interviewed by police.
Police continue to look for passengers who may have been sitting near or next to the man on the flight.
Vancouver Sun

© CanWest News Service 2007

just sayin!

You are absolutely correct. Nowhere in your post or the slightly longer version in your link does it say that the Taser was the cause of the death. But it sure does give plenty of detail as to why the guy was tasered.

I guess this makes you a Democrat?